There is this one guided meditation that I really enjoy. As you sit in the standard cross legged meditation position a gentle voice requests that you close your eyes and picture a mountain. The speaker basically leads you through a series of images and scenarios in which you, the listener, become the mountain. Strong, rooted and unmoving, experiencing the weather of life while remaining impassive and unchanging. The mountain I envision, (my mountain) has a gently sloping snow covered peak - more like a plateau. My mountain is broad and stone dense but appears soft in the precipitous pink/purple fog. At the base of my mountain there are damp woods green and sprawling. Vines, old growth moss and ferns crawling up footpaths for the occasional wanderer. My mountain is calm.
My mountain is nothing like the mountain my friend and I climbed in 2001. Longs Peak in Colorado. As we neared the top, I got really sick and broke down physically and a little mentally too (there's something about being in that much pain and being that high up, freezing and facing lightning and snow, not knowing what awaits you at the top, that makes one feel venerable and terrified). But looking back, knowing that we made it as far as we did and we made it through a night, having had to remain awake - positioned contortionist style against the frame of my tent to keep it from blowing over as small stones pelted the sides... Knowing I can handle or did handle the up close reality nature doles out no matter if you are a mountain or comprised of fragile blood and bones... I'm not saying it makes me feel strong, but it does make me feel capable and calm.
*photos of longs peak in rocky mountain natl. park, colorado May 2001
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